Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Randomize
