I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
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