Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Randomize
