oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Randomize
