i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
