Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Randomize