Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize
