You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
