He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Randomize
