They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Randomize