Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
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