...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
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