eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Randomize
