; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
