With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Randomize
