he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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