on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
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