thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
