i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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