Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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