So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
