Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Randomize
