i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
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