i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
Randomize
