Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Randomize