Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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