you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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