Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
Randomize
