even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
Randomize
