Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
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