I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Randomize