I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
