he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
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