You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Farmville is her only friend.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize
