I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
