I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
