She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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