before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
