The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Shame is for Republicans.
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