Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
