So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
