Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Randomize
