i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Randomize
