yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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