I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Randomize