those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
