why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Randomize
