im drinking this country out of the recession.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
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