I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Randomize
