Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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